Scritch, scritch, scratch, crunch!

Okay, so it is 2am and I WAS asleep. Then I hear a rukus. Well a mini-rukus anyway! And let me tell you i was FREAKED. It was a scratching noise. Right under my window. I was home alone last night and let me tell you I have an overactive imagination when home alone.

So, after the scratching and scritching it gets quiet. I am debating if someone was trying to get into the door and now did and is in the house. I hear breathing on the stairs and very silent footsteps. I am deciding on an escape route and how to get all my children into one room with someone already on the stairs. I pick up my phone to make sure the power hasn't been cut to it. My finger is poised to call 911.

Then I hear CRUNCHING. Jeepers and Gehosaphats! There was a quiet burgler sneaking up my stairs and munching on something!

Okay, so then I start thinking the crunching is not quite in the house. Yet I am near paralyzed with fear. So I need to get to my kids (whose rooms are very close to mine) YET if there is no emergency I do NOT want to wake the lil'buggers and freak them out.

A dilemma.

I somehow decide the prudent thing is to rise out of bed and check. I turn on the light on my bed and didn't hear anyone run down the stairs - so I think I am good. I grab a pen from my bed (weapon doncha know - apparently I think I am a kung fu pen fighting ninja) and creep over to the stairs. Nothin. Turn on the hall light. Nothin.

Now, another dilemma. I know my kids are secured with me. There is nobody on the stairs. BUT what if the crunching scritch scratcher is hiding? {cause burglers do that doncha know} Then if I walk down into the darkness (yeah, the hall light was on... but I sound braver if you think of me creeping down into the darkness - work with me here!) the burgler will jump out and say "boo" and ....

So, I decide I should call IHA to come and check the house. Normally I would call my B.I.L. (he's bailed me out more times than one can believe!) but they moved farther away (sniff, sniff) and so I decide that IHA and Spinny are my best bet. {Do I think about the very nice POLICE OFFICER who lives right next door - nah - my sleep deprived brain just somehow forgets that I do have neighbors} I strongly considered calling Buck Buck, but wasn't sure if she was with or without offspring.

Did I mention that it was 2am?

Did I mention that I wasn't even sure if there WAS a problem or not?

So.... I somehow take a deep breath and decide NOT to bother the Spincerelys. (i am sure they appreciate this) I sucked it up, grabbed another pen (really, I did - now I was a fully armed kung fu pen fighting ninja) and went downstairs. Turned on every light.

Nothin.

No boogie dudes.

More crunching though. Coming from outside. I prudently decide that if there is crunching outside I don't want to know about it. Flickered my porch light a few times (to scare off the intruders! it's a kung fu pen fighter tactic!!) and went back to sleep. Eventually. Much, much later.

Fast forward to this morning. I forgot about the scritcher! I go on with my day. Ethan and I go out to play after Gymboree... I go to the front porch... WHAT? There are apples everywhere and apple pieces and eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww bugs and yukkkkk!

You see, I had left a bag of apples on the porch (it was colder out there, I wanted them to stay good so I could make applesauce!) and well - the animals were happy with me. Don't know if it was racoons, but that is my guess.

I shoulda taken a picture - but I didn't think of it at the time. I cleaned it all up (with gloves on, didn't want my kung fu pen fighting hands to get racoon cooties) and washed and swept the porch.

Hopefully tonight will be quiet.

But just in case.... can I call you??????